15 Simple ways to love yourself as a new Mom

I was talking to a friend a few days back and she was telling me she has joined a gym because she thought she needed to lose some weight. She insisted me to join with her but I couldn’t! I have two kids and she is single so there is a huge difference between our priorities and our choices.

We, as moms, tend to forget ourselves while upbringing kids, while taking care of homes, our careers, our relationships. We forget that we are a human too and we need to feel better in order to manage our families in a better way and we forget to love ourselves first.

Before having kids, I used to love reading books, do exercise, go for long walks, go for meetups, visiting the salon once a week and used to sing songs about loving myself, lol, and a lot more. But now, when I even need these more, I don’t do any of these either.

And what’s my excuse, or any mother’s excuse? We don’t have time. We don’t need to spend money on ourselves. Tell me what’s your excuse? I know, we all know we need to take care of ourselves but do we actually do something for this?

NO!

When was the last time you said, I LOVE MYSELF?

There is a huge difference between KNOWING and DOING. And this is actually right, between bedtimes and morning routines, between school tests and busy weekends, finding energy for yourself is not even hard, it’s impossible. I don’t remember when was the last time I actually did exercise, meditate, tried yoga or visit a salon. This is a never-ending cycle of chores and responsibilities that just keeps us busy.

WHAT TO DO THEN? HOW TO LOVE YOURSELF?

But the thing is, to be a better parent, a joyful parent, we need to take care of ourselves as human beings. We are moms and dads but we are humans first. So have a look at these 15 ideas that will not take much of your time and you can do these whenever you get time. Trust me, you will feel better.

1. Declutter anything

I know, I have bought a lot of stuff that was not even needed for my kids, for myself or for my husband. This clutter has a psychological effect on us and decluttering helps in boosting a good mood. Imagine the feeling you get when you clean your kitchen, scrub your cabinets and empty your skin! Isn’t it amazing? I love a clean kitchen. And just like that, I love decluttering stuff. So whenever you feel low, get a messy drawer or open you cupboard and declutter it and trust me, I love doing this.

2. Let go of negativity

In our lives, a lot of times come when we actually get affected by negative people or negative circumstances. With time, it builds up and nobody suffers but us. So why keep this negativity hurting us when you can let go of this all and lead a happy life instead? Don’t hold grudges, don’t feel bad, ignore the mom shaming and don’t take anything personal, you will see a positive change in your life.

3. Unplug your life

Believe it or not, social media and electronic devices are just making us all restless and unhappy if not used in a good way.

Do you know what happens?

We watch things that we love, a beautiful home, a perfect body and instead of getting inspired, we compare and get hurt. So this is so important. You must unplug when it becomes overwhelming and you need to free your mind. I do this from time to time and trust me, it helps.

4. Get a new haircut

New haircut means a new version of yourself. I remember the time last year, I had a bad patch of time and I ended up cutting my hair. And believe me, it helped me. I got a big change. For women, hairs are their biggest asset so changing hairstyle means changing yourself drastically. You will feel good, try this.

5. Go for a small walk

So imagine yourself waiting outside your kid’s school for home time and you are sitting in your car. Why not go for a mini walk session? Doesn’t matter if it’s a walk around the block or in a nearby park. Just go for it. Try to extract time for little walks. Your body will stretch and you will feel better.

6. Watch a good movie

I know this seems impossible but trust me it isn’t that difficult to find time for a good movie. I have recently started using NETFLIX and I try to get time to watch a movie with my husband once a week. We just put away our phones and watch it together. I am loving this change. I am sure you will love it too.

7. Call an old friend

I know we all are busy and we don’t talk to our friends on daily basis but why don’t we all call our old friends and cherish those old sweet memories together? I love doing that. I have a few of my college friends who are connected to me, we don’t talk daily but I make sure I call them whenever I feel like talking to somebody. And they feel same. I feel blessed to have those friends in my life and I am sure you all would have a few of them too. Just call them and talk about anything! Talk about the times you guys spent together and trust me it will lift your mood up.

8. Write something

Here I am not asking you to write a full journal or a story. Just write whatever you are thinking. I always used to think why do people keep diaries till I got one. Now I love it. I don’t write in it daily or regularly but often on days when I feel I need to write. Write down the best times, write about the things that bother you and anything that’s making you feel bad. Just write it down. Writing has many benefits and I am sure it will definitely help you too.

9. Help somebody

I know, now, you would be thinking how helping anybody could help us but believe me, the true happiness lies in helping others. I have done that and I can tell you the meaning of true happiness is when you see a smile on a stranger’s face. When they pray for you, that happiness is just beyond this world. Generosity is contagious and, believe me, by being kind, by being generous, you are not only helping others but yourself too!

10. Cook your favorite food

Cooking makes me happy. Have you ever cooked something for your own self? Have you ever packed a sandwich for just yourself? We all cook for our family, our kids and guests but how many times we have cooked for just our own selves? I love eating cakes so I bake for myself usually as nobody in my home is so obsessed with eating cakes like I do. You should try this if you haven’t because I loved it and I am sure you would love it too.

11. Drink more water

Everyone says that, and I am telling you again, I am reminding you to drink more water. Do you know that according to many studies, our bad moods are actually associated to dehydration. How many glasses of water do you drink each day? Let me tell you about myself, I am super bad at drinking water so I downloaded an ap and I had to keep a track of how many glasses of water I was drinking. You can do that too. ? who doesn’t want a clear and bright skin!

12. Get rid of old clothes and things

We all have drawers and cupboards full of stuff that we don’t wear anymore or stuff that won’t fit us. Why keep it? Just because you like keeping memories? I know that feeling. But do you know that clutter just makes you depressed so why not just get rid of it and make space for new things. I recently got rid of all my old accessories and clothes that I don’t even wear anymore. I felt so good after that.

13. Color something

Coloring has a positive effect on our mind. That’s why we see so many people turn towards painting when they are hurt. Well, that’s just what I think lol ? anyhow! So you can just get a paper and draw something or get a coloring book. There are many adult coloring books available in bookstores nowadays and you can get them for so reasonable prices. Just color while taking your cup of tea or coffee and enjoy the moment.

14. Sleep early

I have two school going kids and trust me bedtimes are hard. But on weekends when my husband is home, I try to sleep early. Whether it’s just a nap or a long sleep. I choose to sleep rather than going out sometimes. I am not saying sleep early every night as that’s not possible keeping in mind our routines but at-least try. I know my husband is home on weekends and kids are safe and with somebody so I sleep ? and trust me I just love this new change.

15. Sing your favorite song

I have done this a lot of times when I feel down on tough days. You may have heard about singing in the shower? Crazy idea! I know but an awesome one! Ha ha. I know this sounds crazy but trust me you will love it. I am not a good singer, but I sing and I got this from my husband. He sings when we are traveling in our car and he doesn’t let me listen to songs and ask me to listen to him. And now I sing with him too. What an amazing band we make 🙂

And last but not least, be grateful for you have. I won’t tell you to be grateful just because everyone says that. I want to tell you that this life of yours is a blessing and live to your fullest. Love your kids, love yourself, love your life, love your choices and be happy. Make time for yourself. YOU are important to your family and I know it’s hard but not impossible. Do little changes and start from today. You don’t have to be perfect, your tries don’t need to be perfect, just keep trying.

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Saima Nadeem

When was the last time you said, I LOVE MYSELF?

WHAT TO DO THEN? HOW TO LOVE YOURSELF?

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