Motherhood · Parenting

DEAR STAY AT HOME MOM-IT’S OKAY TO SAY YOU ARE NOT OKAY!

DEAR STAY AT HOME MOM-IT'S OKAY TO SAY YOU ARE NOT OKAY!
DEAR STAY AT HOME MOM-IT’S OKAY TO SAY YOU ARE NOT OKAY!

I am a stay at home mom and if you ask me what is the most difficult part of my life right now, I wouldn’t say it’s the dirty dishes or vacuuming the home or doing the laundry or wiping butts. The hardest part is the LONELINESS. Now if you are thinking how can a mommy feel alone! Let me tell you about this more here.  

The feeling of being INVISIBLE and EMPTY is terrible and I know many of you could relate to this because all stay at home moms feel this. I know, I know, I know…. There are kids around you, you should be feeling blessed and happy that God gave you kids and home and a loving husband but this is not a complain.. This is what every stay at home mom feels but fears to admit it. Reason? People start judging her..bashing her… but I am here to tell you that don’t worry I will not judge you and I am here to tell you that it’s okay to say that you are not okay. 

I stay at home and I work from home. But I crave human interaction and some adult talk. I miss meeting my friends and people outside my home. I don’t even get to visit my family often because with infant and a toddler, it is almost impossible to leave home without a tantrum and some drama.  

Is this depression? I ask myself most of the days because I don’t want to meet somebody but somedays I die to go and talk to somebody. I don’t understand why. The feeling of never being enough for my kids, my family, my husband, my friends haunt me. Do you feel same? I know you do! 

So ask me again and I will tell you that it’s okay dear stay at home mama because I know parenting is hard enough. It’s about crying when you don’t get time to take bath after 3 days and whenever you go in the washroom, either your infant needs something or there is a dirty diaper. It is about washing dishes and crying because you miss having a cup of coffee with a peace of mind minus kids jumping all over you. It is about missing eating something without being interrupted a hundred times, for potty, for pee, for water or for anything at all.  

But the thing that hit me most is not the work load, it’s not the laundry piles or the dirty diapers or sleepless nights. It is the lack of affirmation, lack of acknowledgement and lack of some encouragement. I want somebody to tell me at the end of the day that hey mama, you are doing awesome.  

I want a pat on my back just like people get when they are working in offices and they get paychecks. I crave for that appreciation that I am not getting and that is the reason I feel so bad.  

Staying at home is hard because we don’t find a reason to wash face and put on our favorite lipstick. There are no meetups, no parties, no bonuses or anything like this. Motherhood is hard and staying at home is even harder because it’s a selfless job when you are giving yourself away but get nothing in return.  

So maybe if you are wondering if it’s worth it! Or wondering if you are enough!  

I am gonna tell you dear stay at home mom that YOU ARE ENOUGH! I want you to look at the face of you kids and tell me why do you think you are doing any less. 

It’s okay to say you are not okay, but that doesn’t mean you are not a best mama. You are brave and stronger than you thought and your kids have the best mom in the world. If you don’t feel okay, say it, embrace it, share it, discuss it. That’s okay!  

If you think other mothers around you are perfect and they have everything 100% whether it’s about their kids or home or jobs or kitchen.. You are wrong. Nobody has a perfect life, you gotta make it perfect by not comparing it.  

I want you to say it loud: I WILL SAY I AM NOT OKAY WHEN I AM NOT AND THERE IS NOTHING TO BE FEARFUL OF! 

If you like this blog post, don’t forget to tag a friend who needs a hug or an affirmation that it’s fine if you don’t feel good. Moms thing they are not allowed to feel bad but that’s not true. Always believe that God made you mama because you were capable of doing this job named MOTHERHOOD. One of the hardest jobs in this world.  

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Lots of love, 

SAIMA NADEEM 

A SUPERTIRED MOM 

31 thoughts on “DEAR STAY AT HOME MOM-IT’S OKAY TO SAY YOU ARE NOT OKAY!

  1. OMG this post says it all! The feeling I have these days. I am also a fellow Riyadhian going through the same phase. In all this process I have lost interest in doing everything that I enjoyed doing. Its been 3 years now since I moved from Cairo and haven’t been able to adjust here. I am stuck with kids all the time with a 5 year old and a 1 year old So you have spoken my heart out. I wanted to share something on this but you have said it so well. Thanks

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