If you have lost a loved one, trust me this post is for you, from all my heart
Losing a loved one isn’t easy. At times you wonder, how you are gona make it through this life without the person who is no longer supporting you. You are strong, I agree and you show everyone your grief has lessened but inside, its breaking. Even after years and decades of loss, the pain lingers in the corners of the heart but you learn to embrace life and learn to smile with so much pain inside.
Days become normal and everyday passes like a routine until a MEMORY strikes and all of a sudden, all that strength and patience just melt away. It could be anything that triggers that memory and leaves you breathless and all you do is to close your eyes and stop your tears from flowing away. But please don’t! Let them flow because these memories shouldn’t make you weaker. If you wonder if that gets easier anytime soon, then believe me that it does. But it takes time.
People will tell you that memories will fade away and that heartbreak will turn into a dull ache. One day these memories will make you smile instead of making you cry but still, it hits you badly. Using your phone and miss the call from that person, or missing their presence when you graduate or accomplish something really big will make you sad most of the times. I know, I know you are trying hard to live your life with strength because this is what society and people around you expect from you. But I know, its hard and maybe they wont understand that even after so many years, a moment is enough to leave you in tears! I can feel your pain.
And birthdays are the worst time after losing a person who was close to your heart, as you spend all day missing them and remembering the last years with them. You visit their grave, look at the photo albums, listen to voice messages, read their text messages and wish them to be with you.
Losing a loved one when you are least expecting it, leaves you in doubts and pain. It’s a loss that will never be fulfilled again will remain bitter forever. You think about stuff like if they were here, you could have done this, done that, said this, said that.. And all these cruel thoughts keep you in pain. A pain that nobody understands!
But I am here to tell you today that its OKAY! Not everyone would understand that unless they go through it. I am here to tell you that don’t expect others to show you sympathy because people are cold. But IF you find someone who also lost somebody, who can understand your pain, please say it all. Throw away that burden and keep those people close to you who are soothing to your pain and your soul.
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Do you know its fine to grieve as long as you want to! Its okay if you want to sit on your sofa and just cry and sleep. I am here to tell you that I can feel your pain and that grieving is NORMAL. If anybody questions your time limit to feel sad, you don’t need those people in your life. I hope you find joy and love and your sadness turns into smile. But it will take time and you may never get over it and that’s fine.
Grieving doesn’t make you weak or sad, it makes you HUMAN! So for the last time, I want to tell you that this heart wrenching sadness, this heart ache and these tears make you stronger. I wish it gets better and you are not alone in this.
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Lots of prayers.
A SuperTired Mom
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